Your Best Version of Self: The Thermostat Tool

I am not sure where I heard this metaphor exactly, but it has always stuck with me as a mental health coach.  When it comes to being your best self, consider your emotional life like a thermostat. Regardless of the weather conditions outside, your temperature inside is set and remains consistent. If it is cold & snowy or hot & humid, the thermostat holds consistently at its fixed temperature. 

Our best self works similarly.  When we are aligned with our values in thoughts, words and actions (regardless of the conditions) our emotional thermostat stays consistent inside. This is not easy to do. It requires observation and practice, noticing our emotion in triggered moments,  checking in with our internal dialogue and being intentional about how we choose to  manage our triggered stress. 

When stress takes us off balance, we can learn to reset these moments quickly by noticing that our thermostat is not functioning properly. If we complain about “the weather” (our circumstances), it changes nothing. None of us have control over what others are thinking, saying or doing. However, we can reset our internal system to regain alignment and operate again from this healthy place internally. 

I encourage those I work with to reflect on several areas. Assess these for yourself. 

1. Identifying who you are in your best self. This is making a list of qualities that represent your values and highest level of being.. 

2. Knowing the emotional triggers in your unique experience that lead to changes in your emotion, mindset, and daily habits. Be clear about what “weather conditions” you do not have control over so you focus on you, not the external stress. 

3. Spotting moments when you are allowing the “weather conditions” to impact your decisions and habits. 

4. Resetting moments when your thermostat is off so that you can get back to your best self functioning.  You do this by noticing you are off track and getting back to your intention quickly. 

Take the time to do this reflection exercise, using this metaphor to bring you back on track. I use a mantra that resets me back to proper temperature. My mantra is:  Whatever I pay attention to grows. When I direct myself to focus on the things I can control, I reset and move forward with a healthy and productive self. 

What are your weather conditions? Understanding your triggered stress helps you set boundaries about what you have control over and what you don’t. What is your best version of self thermostat? 

Keep it set! If it fails you, then reset!

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